For years carpet cleaning companies have been trying to keep up with our technology. We had the 5-step cleaning process and some have somehow managed to discover more steps to add to the melee. It’s like the Gillette razor. It started off with 1 blade and now my razor has 6 blades – 5 on one side and 1 in back for trimming. Soon the razor will look like a mini mini blind and only be usable by long-faced people.

So, after years of research and development we are proud to announce the release of what we believe to be the ultimate in carpet cleaning technology. It would take even Google and Apple years to trump what we are unveiling here and now for the first time. It’s the worldwide release of our spectacular 32-step cleaning process. And here it is: Read Full Article

Last year we had the privilege of having 13 skunks at our work place. Skunks are cute animals, fun to watch, but the smell became unbearable at times. Coming into work and finding myself face to face with a very large skunk at 5:00 a.m. is not the way to start any day. So, we had a company come out to catch the skunks and release them into the wild.

The first day I checked the traps, I saw a cute little raccoon trapped. I really debated on whether to release the raccoon myself or call the company. They charge $75.00 a trip so, me being the company man I am, I decided to release the raccoon myself. When I got close to the cage the raccoon roared so viciously that being a company man wasn’t so important all of a sudden. Eventually I did let the raccoon out. When I opened the cage I ran one way and the raccoon ran in the opposite direction. My respect for raccoons jumped way up there with the likes of the saber tooth tiger. Read Full Article

Upholstery cleaning is 50% art and 50% technical.   Most carpets can be cleaned the same way but that’s not true for cleaning upholstery.   There are a variety of fabrics and patterns each with their own vulnerabilities.  The technical comes from knowing what kind of fabric and what chemicals, process and technique is best for that fabric. Read Full Article

It’s the landlord again.

Looking down on the street through the rain covered window, I see him run toward the front of the building.  As I listen to him climb the stairs, I reach into the top desk drawer and pull out my piece.

I flip the cylinder open, glance at the dead eyes of the back of the shells.  I take another sip of bourbon and set the bottle down.

I set the revolver down on the desk, then pick it up again.  Last time just having it on the desk made him nervous.  Time to up the ante a bit.

The door opens as I place the barrel in my mouth.  Our eyes lock, and I realize the metal is colder than it looks.

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Given the time of year and the current weather, I’ve been wondering just how bad a wet reindeer would smell.  Now, like me, you’re asking, “what does this have to do with carpet?”  It’s a reach, but hey, Al’s never going to stop bugging me if I don’t write an article.  So turn away if you’re a vege-fascist, but once upon a time carpets were furs and skins.

That’s right, if you wanted a rug, you went out and hunted something that would look good on the floor of your cave.  Read Full Article